Because ... Money.

I am job hunting.

Unfortunately it appears my hunting gear is not high enough quality. I need to get a bigger net to capture them in. Which seems unfair (gasp, life is never unfair). I have great qualifications.

I will show up on time (ish), I will not smell and I will not be drunk.

Is that not a good enough reason to hire me?
What does it matter what my life goals are?
What does it matter where I have worked before?
Why do you care where I am going to be in five years?
Or ten?

Really.

No one knows. I feel like being punished for having vague goals is not acceptable. Would I like to have a white picket fence and 2.5 children?

Not really.

Does it change anything about me that I want a library attached to a fantastic bar?

Nope.

What life choices I make have no bearing on my work ethic. I inherited my work ethic from parents who are workaholics; from siblings who are perfectionists. I used to think I had no work ethic, or that it wasn't very good. Kind of like a day old salad, edible but weirdly wilted. I maintained that belief until I got out my childhood bubble. The first job I held as an adult showed me how very wrong I was. I am not a workaholic, I am not a perfectionist, I do believe in doing things in a timely manner and correctly. I am being paid to provide a service and it behooves me to get it done to the best of my ability in the shortest amount of time as possible. It is not my right to work. I am not entitled to employment. If I am doing an unsatisfactory job then I should be fired.

This is not a commonly held view point.

If more interviews and applications asked questions along those lines I would already have a job. Instead I get questions about my life plans, of which I have none, and when I can't answer or when they see through the bullshit answers I am done. They move on to the next applicant who still believes, naively, that life will actually allow a master plan. Those poor dears. Life happens and plans fall apart. It's much easier to adapt plans if they aren't hammered down in concrete and dreams.

This is how I feel after getting the "We decided to go with a more qualified candidate, but please apply to similar positions when they are posted on our site" email.

Actually No

Actually is a word that should not be used more than once in a while. It is actually not necessary to get the point across, and if someone is actually paying attention it actually gets really annoying. It seems that people actually use 'actually' when presenting the most. One of my classmates last semester used the word to introduce every new talking point for his presentation. It not only irritated me, it caused me to be unable to remember anything he said but for the word actually.

In short if you want to make a long lasting impact on your audience either have a fabulously intelligent presentation or abuse the word actually. Please for the sake of anyone actually listening stop using the word actually.

I thank you in advance for your acceptance of this life philosophy.

Spike Jones