Best day of the week

As I was bumming in my room this morning (I haven't been feeling kinda sick) I was struck with a brilliant idea for a story. I can't tell you anything now, but it is going to be the most epic story ever! Not an epic like Lord of Rings, more like the book has a completely surprising ending where after reading people will be all like "That was an epic ending!" The totally will! If I ever write it...

I need a good name for the main character. That is a huge issue holding up the writing process at the moment.

I will post when I figure her name out.

TGIF... I want candy

I had a really cool inspiring thought for the day... but then I put it somewhere and haven't been able to find it since. I did that with my water bottled yesterday. I accidentally took it home instead of my travel mug, so I got up in the morning and had nothing to put my coffee in (I decided to not take that as a sign that I shouldn't have made coffee that morning, instead I decided that it meant I should go to work later... after I had finished drinking my coffee).

I forgot to take my water bottle with me to work (which is only necessary because we ran out of paper cups) so after lunch I was going to grab it. It had been sitting on my desk all morning, but while eating I managed to pick it up and move it. The problem was that I didn't remember where I set it. Even worse I walked out of my room without it. I ended up walking back up the stairs to try and find it. It took me ten minutes to find the stupid thing. I live in a dorm room that is smaller than a 10X10 storage unit (not really, but almost) I had recently cleaned my room and still could not find the bloody thing. I was incised. Ended up being under a pile of cloths I hadn't put away yet. The stupid thing is that I had looked through the cloths and some how missed it. I don't know how I couldn't see a bright pink water bottle in the middle of my dark cloths.

Anyway. I have been super spacey lately. I can't seem to remember anything.

So happy thing of the day



Is it not the cutest thing ever! Well maybe not ever. But it is super kawaii. Makes me happy. So does candy. I want candy. But I can't have any right now, cuz I am getting sick... *sniff*

So my boss is having vespers at his house tonight and all the kids on campus are invited. I am not sure what the rule of thumb is... Do I go? If I don't go is that really bad? Such an awkward situation. So what do I do?

Shenanigans

I am calling Shenanigans on one of my friends. I do not say everything that I think. I really don't. I only say about a 1/3 of what I am thinking at any given time. Of course I am constantly thinking and critiquing things. It's not my fault if normal people have one thought for my three. Or four. If I could remember anything I would have been a great private detective. But I don't. Which makes me kind of sad. I always wanted to be a private detective or a bounty hunter. They basically do the same thing. I was enamored with the idea as a child, I really wanted to be out in the streets fighting crime and bringing down the bad guys. I would be the best one out there, the girl every culprit feared. The girl that never stopped once she had a target, I would hunt them down to the ends of the earth if that's what it took.

I wanted to be a modern Sherlock Holmes. Or Cat Woman. Yes I do realize that she is a cat burglar and as such would probably have a bounty on her head. But she is damn sexy. She makes crime look hot. I remember the time I first realized that if I was going to live a life like my awesome Cat Woman then I would actually have to steal stuff. It was a bad day. That was the day I finally had to say good-bye to full body leather outfits. Not that I have ever owned or worn one, for which my family is very grateful, but I had to hang up the dream on the metaphorical peg.

Occasionally when I am feeling nefarious I will go to the subconscious closet and pull out my childhood dreams, shake off the brain dust and prance around pretending to be a defender of justice that has a fetish for works of art and can't help but steal them. Talk about giving myself a weird guilt complex. Hero of justice needs counseling for kleptomania, yeah that would make a great comic... Hmm... That is a great idea.

See I didn't talk about any of that while at work which proves my hypothesis that I have more thoughts on average per second that normal people. Meaning that even if I do say what I am think more than normal people I am still not saying more than a 1/3 of my thoughts! HahA! I win.

Fell off the bandwagon

Day 2 of no coffee: Didn't happen. I had coffee this morning and it was the most delicious thing ever!

I also realized that there are certain things I can't eat in the morning. Anything super sweet makes me gag if I eat it before 10 a.m., this does not include chocolate though. Not entirely sure why chocolate is okay but toast and jam isn't. I wanted to eat something today before I went to work and the only thing easy to make was non-toasted toast and jam, basically bread and jam. I would have toasted it but we aren't allowed to have toasters in the dorm.

So I put homemade blueberry jam on the bread and took a huge bite expecting and explosion of delicious sensations in my mouth. But no, it was like someone took the super nasty wedding cake frosting and jammed a whole pack down my throat. I am not sure I will be able to eat anything sweet for the rest of the day. It was nasty sweet. I still ate it. Because as a completely broke person that is what you do, but still.

It was even worse becuase I was expecting untold deliciousness and I got sickly sweet. Not a good start to any morning.

But I had coffee! So it's all good.

Update: Homemade blueberry muffins may be good, but I can't eat them without gagging. I tried really hard to enjoy it and eat it all with out gagging. It was a futile gesture, I was doomed to not be able to eat anything sweet today. I have maxed out my sweet meter. This is just unreal.

Inflicting my own hell

I woke up this morning and decided that I have become too addicted to coffee and that I need to stop drinking it every morning. So I didn't have any coffee this morning. That doesn't mean that I haven't had any caffeine. I had English Breakfast tea, which has caffeine in it, but it wasn't very good. It kinda tasted like stale trough water. Not pleasant.

I really want coffee. I can't think through the daze of desire. I want coffee. Which makes me think that not drinking it this morning was a good idea. But I really want it... But it seems like I really am getting addicted. But it's soooo good. I should buy decafe coffee, then I could drink it without feeling guilty. But it's such a yummy guilty pleasure.

This marks day one of me not consuming coffee. So far still alive. This is disproving theory of death with lack of coffee. Not a good sign for the guilty pleasure side of the argument.

On a side note listening to Disney music seems to relieve some of the withdrawal symptoms. That leaves much to be questioned about Disney.

Update: Not drinking coffee gives me a serious headache in the afternoon. Disney music does not help headaches, neither does Miley Cyrus. Whose name is Smiley Cyrus without the S... I feel like an idiot for not realizing this sooner.

Update: Pretending that water is coffee does not work. Neither does pretending water is alcoholic... The headache is still pounding against my temples.

I am gonna kill you!

Who do I hate? Myself. Why? Because life is evil. Right now I feel like I will never be able to write professionally and I should just give up while I am ahead of the game. Not like anyone actually gets ahead, they just think they do. There is a very good reason for my pessimistic attitude. I have been working on an article for work, the same one I drug my ass out of bed early to write, all day and most of yesterday. I have spent probably close to three days writing the bloody thing. I was having a hard time writing the leed (normally spelled lead, but because journalists can't ever share we get our own spelling). So I did what I normally do in this situation, I asked for help. Then I went to lunch, cuz I was starving.

When I got back from lunch my article had a better leed, better structure and all around was just fucking better. If this was not a normal occurrence it wouldn't have bothered me, but since this happens every time I write something it makes me angry. I spent hours slaving over an article only to have it completely revamped in less than an hour. I don't even understand why they hired me. They obviously can write it by themselves, write it better and in less time, so even bother hiring someone to write for them?

It just makes me realize what utter crap my writing is.

Maybe I really do need to just stop. At least stop writing happy articles, I am pretty sure I could kick someones ass writing satire. FML.

This is just great

There is nothing in this world as awesome as dragging my ass out of bed early to get an article done for work only to find out that it doesn't need to be done until tonight... so aggravating. I don't think I would have minded over much except for the fact that I was at work before 8 a.m. today. That is freakishly early. Normally I am not even out of bed by 8. There is rarely a time I have the brain power to be a functional person before 10 in the morning. Seriously.

Worst part is that it was totally my misunderstanding. I thought the article was going to be late, but then found out it wasn't going to be late until tonight... so I had all day to work on it. This makes me grumpy. Very grumpy. It also makes me want more caffeine. More COFFEE!

I want coffee ice cream.

Update: Getting up early does funky things to my body, I can't tell if I am sick or just rejecting morning. Either way I feel like puking, not a pleasant feeling when trying to write a feel good article.

Please don't hate me

One thing I had not expected to encounter when doing my internship this summer was writing stories about my friends. I am not sure why this thought never occurred to me, we all go to the same college and I am writing articles for my college this summer, so it would make sense that I would write a few articles about friends. It doesn't help that all of my friends live with jam packed schedules and plenty of responsibility. I kinda wish they were all slackers like me.

I had a difficult decision to make. I was writing a story about Bestfriend's internship. The problem is that when I was interviewing her she talked like she would to me and not to a reporter, so I can now directly quote her, or I can para quote her so she won't hate me later. But if I know that she would say it that way is it really Franken quoting?

Franken (like Frankenstein, get it?) quoting is when a PR person patches a quote, so it isn't a direct quote but can be used as one... It happens quite a bit. People get angry when you quote them saying something stupid. Not that I blame them, I want to sound as good as possible when being quoted.

The number one rule of writing is...

If you want to stay friends with people don't write about them using their name... And if you are saying something bad about them don't let them read it. Ever.

Or you could just never write, that is much easier.

Evil publishing things

I was having a good day until I went to my favorite website and found out it is being closed. So ANGRY! I can understand why most of the website is being taken down, sort of. The site is a place were fans of manga have gathered for years, and now I find out that due to licensing issues they have to take down the site. This was a huge fan collaboration that took manga that had recently been published in Japan, scanned it, cleaned it, translated it, and then posted it were people in other countries could read it before it was available.

It was a great thing, a wonderful collaboration that showed how people could come together and over come any hurdle. It was a place were it didn't matter who you were, or what you had done in the past so long as you loved manga. And now because some jerk wad it is all going to go away. *tear*

This is me being very angry because I will need to wait over two years for the publishing companies in America to catch up with where Japan is now! AAAAAAHHH! So annoying. Grr.

Pictures I drew at work, wait I mean during lunch

This illustrates part of the picture book I drew for Bestfriend. The only difference is that I forgot I had these and redrew them with colored pencils that I stole from Bestfriend. She is awesome.

It was after lunch and I really wanted coffee.



I didn't have time to brew another pot of coffee... Then Bam! I saw my instant coffee.



I was excited to get coffee.



I got lazy and didn't want to finish drawing... it takes to much time. So until later this is going to not be finished. Okay?

Latest obsession

recently I have become obsessed with drawing things. Not like drawing like an adult, but drawing like a little kid again. It is super fun. I got so caught up in the drawings that I made Bestfriend a book with drawings based off of her favorite blog. It was a lot of fun. I illustrated my epic battle with instant coffee. That stuff is seriously nasty. So gross. I wanted to gargle hydrogen peroxide to get the taste out of my mouth.

Have you ever tried gargling hydrogen peroxide? That stuff is lethal. I had to gargle it once in high school when I had a super bad throat infection. I got it from my boyfriend at the time, the sucky part was that I didn't even get it from kissing him. Stupid boy got me sick and I didn't even get anything fun out of it. Grr.

So Yeah, this coffee was seriously nasty stuff. I think it must have been ground up cow dung. It was soo bad. I decided to illustrate my battle with not puking all over my computer at work. It was really fun. I will scan in the pictures and post them, it will be awhile since I don't have a scanner. Some how while I was drawing last night I decided to set ninjas against the coffee beans. I am not sure how this happened, but my little hissy fit turned into an all out war between coffee beans and ninjas.

The ninjas won. Of course. I am super excited to give the story book to Bestfriend though, I hope she likes it.

One small problem is that I did get carried away and quite a bit of profanity in the book... maybe she won't notice.

About the name

My sophomore year of college I took a communication theory and research class. There was a total of seven people, including the teacher. It was all girls. Best class ever, except when we actually had to do work. Then it kinda sucked cuz it was a rather obnoxious subject matter, there was a bunch of different theories we had to learn about. All of them were on the same topic and the names generally sounded similar, I could tell you different theories but not their names now. At the end of the semester we did a huge research project that kicked my ass. I was so scarred that I can no longer say no to people asking me to fill out surveys. I can't help but empathize with their agony. It is extremely difficult to get people to take a short survey, most people are all like "I'll do it later, 'kay?" But they never come back.

I started this post off trying to get to the point of telling how I got the name of master of distraction. I ended up talking about the class instead. That is basically how I got the name though, during class I would manage to make a jump from a class topic to a random subject matter. We would be discussing different models of communication and then I would compare it to guava juice, then someone else in the class would say their opinion of guava juice and before anyone had realized it the entire class was way off topic. Half way through the semester my teacher realized I hat this ability and started to call me the Master of Distraction. It stuck. Anytime I am around me teacher and smoothly change the topic she makes comments about me being the Master. I generally laugh and change the topic again.

When I realized that I did that to myself when writing I decided to name my blog that. So that is the story. Super interesting right?

not really no.

Last nights vestiges

For the last few weeks I have been obsessing over Bestfriends favorite blog. I would say it is my favorite blog, but she has definitely won my vote for best blog ever!

Anyway, so I was in a caffeinated stupor and had an insightful moment. One of those moments when the world makes perfect sense. If I was a Buddhist I would have reached enlightenment, since I am not I can assume it happened because I had consumed to much caffeine while being sleep deprived.

My school has really, really bad internet service, like so bad that whenever I have a paper due I spend the entire day before writing praying that by some miraculous chance I will be able to get online to find references. Since I see no reason for me to have to do this I figured there must be an extremely evil presence that kept me from my life line.

Then it hit me, it's a fairy! Not just any fairy, it's the Evil Internet Fairy of DOOM! that is keeping me from getting internet service.



and that is how I knew I had read to much Hyperbole and a Half. I was drawing pictures in paint... I don't know if I will do this again, it was kinda fun.

Wrong side of the cirle bed

Today is one of those days when both sides of the bed are wrong. No matter which side you get out of it will be a bad day. It all started so innocently last night when I got to bed an hour after I had planned, it was still before midnight though. I thought everything was going to be fine since I had gone to bed early enough to still get a good nights sleep. I would have, but there was this freaking bug outside my window that would buzz. It was sooo annoying. I wanted to through a grenade outside my window to get the freaking thing to shut up.

Not enough hours later my alarm goes off. It's shrill beep jolted me out of the slightly disturbing dream I was having. So I stumble around my room half awake, still partially dreaming getting ready for the day. I woke up early because I needed to finish an article for work that I was supposed to do yesterday... yeah it still isn't done, but more on that later. Then I realize my boss doesn't get in until this afternoon, he is volunteering at an event all week. I could have slept in.

I start my coffee, which is totally needed since I drug my sorry ass out of bed before eight a.m.. The coffee permeates my room with it's tantalizing promise... it smelled sooo good. I picked up my sugar jar, that is another story, and shook it, because in summer nothing escapes the wrath of humidity. Nothing! Not even Tupperware. It is that bad here. I had to shake up the sugar so I could get it out of the jar. I hadn't screwed the lid on tight. Sugar went all over my floor... all over. It is still there since I was in a hurry to get to work.

My coffee decided to leap out of my cup and all down my chest too. It was like "abandon ship!" and dripped all over the place. Even more angry. I am awake, I don't need to be, my bare feet are sugar encrusted and my chest is dripping coffee. At this point I should have just said "fuck it" and gone back to sleep. But no. I have to be all responsible and go to work. Grr.

The Evil Alarm Clock of Doom then decided to show me that I was ten minutes late for my already pushed back work arrival time. Then it started raining. Not one of those pestilent sore rains that just sort of oozes out of the sky. No it was one of those the sky has gone bulimic and is hurling its guts out like a fire hydrant about to explode. In about thirty seconds it had gone from sunny to Niagara falls. coincidentally enough I had left my umbrella in my car, not in my room. I had figured that it was unlikely to rain.

I hate it when I am wrong. A dear friend ended up lending me her umbrella so I could go get mine from the car. When I had managed to tromp down the stairs and get out to my car the rain had stopped. I needed to return the borrowed umbrella to my friend so I stumbled back up the stairs. After throwing my stuff together I headed off to work. I was the first one to arrive so I had to have an adventure in my purse to find the key. By the time I had gotten to work I was well past my attempted arrival time.

I was super excited because I could finally get started on that article I needed to finish. But no. The server was down. As in like, the thing that all of my files are saved to is not working. All of my FILES! I couldn't get to them. At this point I was alternating between bursting into tears or screaming flames.

I didn't know what to do. My boss was gone for the morning. No one else was in the office and it looked like no one was going to be in soon. The one day I show up early I can't work. I hate my life.

Phone tag is never a fun thing. I don't even know how many people I ended up calling to get a hold of the people I needed. It took me over half an hour to find someone who could help me.

Finally I think that I can sit down and finish the freaking article. Leaning back into my chair I pick up my coffee and sip. It as cold. In all the time I had been running around trying to figure out how to work my coffee had gotten cold.

It was a very bitter sweet moment. My cooooooffeeeeeeeee! *sniff*

My crazy family

I went home last weekend to see my siblings, who I haven't seen since Christmas. At least we all haven't gotten together since Christmas ... a long, long time ago. It was back when I was in high school still. Not all of my sibs were there. One of them is still in India doing her thing. She should be back next Christmas though.

I ended up sleeping on a little foam pad on a hard wood floor, not comfortable. My sister is staying in my room until the basement gets finished. Not like that really matters because I am going to college out of state. I forgot that during the summer my dad works freaking early in the morning. He would be up everyday before six. That is a time I constitute as evil, unless I am winding down for the night. Mommy also decided it was time to can things. The kitchen was then always steamy and filled with gelatinous mixtures in cans.

Well glass jars. I never understood why it is called caning when the stuff is put in a glass jar. Shouldn't it be called jaring? I am going to coin this term.

She jared apricots and cherries, made apricot jam, blueberry jam, cherry jam, cherry and blueberry jam, blueberry syrup, and cherry syrup. It was a confusing day.

This week was also camp meeting. My parents camper sat up on the mountain all week while we ran around doing necessary things - Shopping! It was great. But camp meeting. It was great. Our camper really enjoyed sitting up there that week without us staying in it. We have a great camper that can watch itself for a week. We did end go up on Saturday to have a family picnic. In the late afternoon, during a meeting, some people around the fire pit decided they wanted pop. Since we didn't have any a guy got up to go grab a cooler. He brought one over. It wasn't his. We didn't know whose it was. His reasoning "It's a church function so it's not stealing." We agreed with his logic.

He got the wrong one. It was filled with water and diet pop. Digging in the bottom produced a few drinkable beverages. He then had to run it back to the camp ground he had borrowed it from since the meeting was getting out.

My sister is going through a divorce and I found out this weekend how they had decided on who got what. The have a huge collection of movies so they divided them up into three piles: his, hers, ones they both want. The took the both pile and divided it by playing rock, paper, scissors. I was flabbergasted. Best. Idea. EVER!

If I ever became a judge working through a messy divorce case I would totally make them do rock, paper, scissors. At least for somethings.

Home safe and mostly sane

If sanity counts as having an intense desire to drive off the road and hit a power line just to relieve the monotony. There is something that I had forgotten I hate. I will give you one guess, here's a hint. It's orange and white and strikes anger in the hearts of all drivers. Yes that's right, it's a traffic cone. Something that is normally precedented by the worst sign in the world: Road work in 2 miles.

I hate those signs! Every time I saw one on the drive home I had to resist the urge to knock all the cones over with my car. Bwahahahahaha! What now traffic workers, eat that! But alas, I cannot actually do that. For one thing I am borrowing my parents car. They wouldn't appreciate me denting the bumper.

This was my first time driving on a long road trip, it was also my first time driving by myself. I am awesome! Not really, but it makes me feel better. I didn't even accidentally hit any traffic cones. It had to be one of the most boring trips I have ever been through. Although I think it would have been more boring if someone else was driving, because the scenery is boring. Hills for as far as the eye can see. Brown hills. Kinda like someone just dumped a bunch of shit on the ground and I had to drive through it.

To fend of involuntary suicide (Driving off the road and hitting a power line) I blasted techno music. Well at first it was just any music, but then for the last two hours I was keeping myself awake by raving to techno. It was great. Except I only had a few techno songs to listen to (mostly Cascada) and it was so loud I ended up giving myself a headache. I also couldn't hear my phone when my mommy called to see where I was. My phone ringer was set to the loudest volume, which is pretty freaking loud.

Now that I am deaf and pissed at all the construction that is happening I am going to get some seriously needed shut eye.

why I hate summer

I think humidity was invented by the devil. He goes to certain areas and starts a hell fire roasting right under the city to make it humid. He then reaps lots of benefits as people commit illegal acts.

Summer also makes me feel like I am in a hamster wheel. I feel like I keep doing the same things over and over and not getting anywhere in life. I don't know why I am doing it, I just know I need to. Because running in one place is important for the balance of the universe. Why else to people willingly go to the gym and work out. It's cuz they drew the bad lot and are working out so that everybody can be lazy.

Something astounding happened last night. It was sooo humid it set of a fire alarm. Not joking. I was getting all cozy in my bed when this high pitched sound pierced the silence. Stupid smoke detector was a freaking shrieking disc of death. It was terrible.

The Noise! I wanted to go and buy a sledge hammer so I could beat it until it could never make a sound again. Like I said earlier the only thing the girl had done was turn off her ac unit making the room hot and stuff. and Kabooom. The freaking thing went off. Stupid erratic smoke detectors that make my life difficult.

The joys of beings broke

In high school I thought I understood what it felt like to be broke. I didn't, I did understand what it felt like to be locked in a mental institute though. I did not understand what being broke really meant until this last year. I took so many things for granted as a child, I really want to be back at that state economically, when I can take things for granted. Like clean clothes, it is expensive to wash clothes. Or books, I love books, but they are fucking expensive. Toilet paper is something most people take for granted, (I have a mild paranoia of being stuck in a bathroom without toilet paper).

There are still things I should value more than I do, like education, but whatever. There is now one thing I will appreciate more, cooked food. It is so nice to be able to walk into a room that has already cooked food. It is also really nice to have normal food. I am going home for the end of this week, and I didn't want to have a bunch of food spoiling in my room when I was gone, so I didn't get any groceries this week (that and they are really expensive) so for lunch I had the pleasure of eating a peanut butter cheese sandwich. That was all I had in my room. It was gross. The only reason I tried it was because a friend had recommended it.

It didn't help that the bread was an everything bagel from Panera. Don't get me wrong, I love Panera, but the toppings were a bad idea. I think it would have been better had the cheese not been melted... it was just a gloppy mess that sort of glued my jaws together. Not pleasant.

I am looking forward to going home and having real food.

Living battles

At work today I was blasting "Battlefield" by Jordin Sparks when it hit me. I look like an idiot when singing silently with my mp3 player. For the first time in almost seven years someone scared me so bad I almost peed my pants. I was focusing on my work when someone came into the room, I didn't hear because I was blasting music, and grabbed my shoulder. Scared the shit out of me. I was on guard for a few minutes, but it is a really good song. It happened again. So humiliating.

I had a really good point I was trying to get at... Damn. Well... Just kidding. Hahaha... Fail.

So at work we are getting new carpet. Which should be a good thing. But it's not. We have been playing musical furniture. We move all the furniture from one room to another and then back... so aggravating. I think carpet layers should be able to put the carpet down under the furniture. I know this will never be able to happen... but I can dream. Oh yes, that is what the point was.

Life is full of battles. Proving to your teachers you deserve to pass their classes, even though I never show up or do homework. Convincing the police that you really were going the speed limit. Telling your boss that you deserve that raise. Wiggling your way out of curfew. Getting you parents to let you drive the car for the very first time. The intense feelings of realizing there is no more toilet paper in the bathroom. I think that one is the worst.

All the hurdles that people fly over everyday should be considered epic battles. That makes every person a hero/villain, because at some point we are one and the other. It just depends on how the story is being framed. I, of course, am always a villain. It pays more. I get annoyed when people whine about not having an impact on the world. If everyone had a world wide impact only people that have a universal impact would be noticed. It's life to only make baby waves, but baby waves have a longer lasting effect. Throw a big rock into a pond and it will have a big wave followed by after shock. Throw a handful of pebbles into a pond and there is chaos, a much longer after shock and ripples. Lesson, since of course people need this spelled out. One person can make a wave that while imactful does not last, but several people doing the same thing will have little impacts that end up with a huge explosion. Team work is the best way to build a lasting image that will shake the world.

So when you go out today to take the world by storm don't forget to take you friend with you. And always pack extra toilet paper.

Twiddiction and Buffy.

Or better known as the "scary twilight fans from hell" the twiddicts. The Twilight Addict, get it? Hahaha. Yeah it isn't very funny. Those girls are freaking scary as hell. Teenagers in general should be avoided. I have decided to get a cross necklace. Teenage girls are evil incarnate, right? Therefore it should work to repel the evil before it can bitch slap.

At work today one of the maintenance guys, they're currently replacing the carpet, was talking about how Eclipse was rated the worst movie so far. His daughter freaked. Apparently she went online and started showing him reviews to prove that this movie was in fact the best. Which it is. Not like it took any work to make it better then the previous two. Seriously. Twilight is sooooo overrated. If I was Bella, which will never happen because I have a brain, I would have left Edward on his sorry ass and found someone else to turn me. After being turned I would beat Jacob into submission and rule both men. Then I would have the best of both worlds. Best story ever! Oh and I would totally kick Buffy's ass if she showed up. Just saying.

I had a disturbing moment a few years ago (shocking). One of my (former) friends compared me to Bella. At the time I had a huge crush on this guy and was freaking about it. I can still clearly remember what she said. "He just doesn't understand that you will always love him. You're like Bella, you will always be there for him." Her words were mildly disturbing.

Until recently I hadn't even thought about it. Under more scrutiny I realized why it bothered me.

1. Bella has no personality and really pisses me off.
2. I so didn't love that guy.
3. Bell sucks!
4. When had I ever said anything about always being there?
5. Bella pisses me off.
6. I know I was bitching, but I wasn't asking for advice.
7. Why on earth would any self respecting women compare herself, or her friends, to Bella Swan! WHY! I don't understand.

Comparing someone to Bella is like telling them they are vapid and obsessed with dead things. Along with being clingy and having no self respect. Grr. So annoying.

I really wish that Buffy and Twilight would merge so that Buffy could kill Edward's ass. Then the story would be interesting.

Dive Bomber Mouse ... takes over the world

I was at work minding my own business, when all of a sudden my mouse jumps across the screen and starts tweaking out. I was a little surprised but I figured it would finish tweaking in a few seconds and then not do it again, ever. Once it had decided to be a cooperative piece of electronic ingenious technology I went on my merry way assuming everything was just peachy now. And we all know what assumptions do... So I now have a mouse that works approximately half of the time I want it to. The other half it chills in a corner of the screen refusing to move. It makes me want to go back to the good ol' days of non-optical mouses... Is it mice or mouses?

I am going with mouses because it should make people realize that I am talking about computer mice and not Pinky and the Brain. Although I love Pinky and the Brain, best kids show ever! EVER! Nothing they have on TV now even comes close to the awesome shows of when I was a kid.

Except for maybe Avatar: the Last Airbender. That is a pretty rockin' show. Although it the movie seems to be dubious, I have only heard bad reviews ... really bad reviews. It makes me want to cry. I spent hours looking forward to this movie and all I hear is that it is terrible. *sigh* it is enough to drive someone into a caffeine drinking frenzy.

Avatar: the Last Airbender is the real avatar. The people who decided to put out "Avatar" (Sarcasm Quotes) the same year as The Last Airbender are poo heads. This movie has been showing previews before "Avatar" did, and they just jump up and are all like "I want to make a film using a plot that is waaaaaaay over done, then name it after a movie that is going to come out a few months after I do, on top of all the other stupid stuff I am also going to put subtitles in an "original" font that looks just like papyrus... I am such an awesome movie, Watch me watch me!

"Plus I started a 3D crazy so anyone who wears glasses is going to have a fun time watching me! Oh yeah, btw I am going to push a huge agenda 'cuz that sounds fun! Also the only real reason to watch me is for the special effects, so you might as well watch a documentary on how the effects were made 'cuz it would give the same feel."

And that is why I refuse to watch "avatar" it is a sham that should have put a good plot before the special effects. A movie isn't worth watching unless it has a good plot, good acting and good effects. So "avatar" is out.