I am not talking about my age. I am talking about something much more important. The damn afghan I've been working on since the spring 2010 semester. A year later and all I have to count are 21 little stripes. Although that technically means I have completed eighty-five rows (of death).
This blanket I am in the middle of crocheting is of the devil. The thing is bigger than a freaking king size bed. It's huge. I have done some pretty stupid things in my life but this blanket is definitely in the top ten dumbshit ideas list.
The great thing is that once the blanket is done there is no way it could ever be to small. I am almost positive that me and three other people could fit comfortably under it. If it was just me, which it will be, I will be able to wrap the blanket around me three or four times and sleep snuggled up in a little cocoon.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Weddings, car trips and stuff
I promised to blog about the wedding I went to about a week and a half ago, and I will, just not today.
Okay, just to give a small taste of how epically awesome the entire weekend was here are my two favorite quotes/moments of intense embarrassment.
1. Groom "How do you take the wrapping off?"
Bridesmaids "It's called fondant you and you eat it."
Groom "Seriously?"
Bridesmaids "Yes."
2. Me "If you need help getting off just ask."
Jess *Dying of laughter, bent over as far as her dress will let her*
Me "Omg. I meant if you needed help getting your dress off!"
Jess *Still dying of laughter*
My sad attempt to explain that awkward slip was that it at the ever end of am excruciatingly long day. If that doesn't make sense nothing I say will justify the awkwardness.
Anyway. The rest of the wedding was good, not nearly as exciting, but good.
I have recently moved, almost all my stuff, from one state to another. Not metaphorically either. I now live in the middle of "Who the fuck wants to be here?"
Which is generally not answered, because no one else was around to hear the question.
Yes. So, I never thought I would say this, but I kind of miss Lincoln. I mean who could miss anything in the middle of a state size cornfield? Really?
But Alas, I do.
I whole bunch of stuff has happened recently and I will try to post more regularly. Meaning I am going to attempted posting regularly again, well more like for the first time.
Okay, just to give a small taste of how epically awesome the entire weekend was here are my two favorite quotes/moments of intense embarrassment.
1. Groom "How do you take the wrapping off?"
Bridesmaids "It's called fondant you and you eat it."
Groom "Seriously?"
Bridesmaids "Yes."
2. Me "If you need help getting off just ask."
Jess *Dying of laughter, bent over as far as her dress will let her*
Me "Omg. I meant if you needed help getting your dress off!"
Jess *Still dying of laughter*
My sad attempt to explain that awkward slip was that it at the ever end of am excruciatingly long day. If that doesn't make sense nothing I say will justify the awkwardness.
Anyway. The rest of the wedding was good, not nearly as exciting, but good.
I have recently moved, almost all my stuff, from one state to another. Not metaphorically either. I now live in the middle of "Who the fuck wants to be here?"
Which is generally not answered, because no one else was around to hear the question.
Yes. So, I never thought I would say this, but I kind of miss Lincoln. I mean who could miss anything in the middle of a state size cornfield? Really?
But Alas, I do.
I whole bunch of stuff has happened recently and I will try to post more regularly. Meaning I am going to attempted posting regularly again, well more like for the first time.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
road trips should go to hell
I almost died today. I can't even tell you how many freaking times.
It was horrible.
I thought the worst road trip of my life had already happened. I thought it was that trip when the girl driving had only two hours of sleep and fell asleep a few times while driving. This would have been more terrifying if I had been awake to witness it. The worst part of that trip was finding out that neither of us knew what exit to take to get to her house. Like I said it was pretty traumatic.
That doesn't include the passing on a two-lane highway, while going up a hill that had guard rails.
I thought we were going to die for sure.
Obviously it didn't happen. Barely.
Yeah, so I had previously thought that was the most terrifying road trip. Today I had to down grade that to the number two slot.
I sat in the back seat reading so I couldn't see out the front window. Most aggressive driver I have ever ridden with. Did not understand the concepts of space, blinkers or left lane cruising. He would drive fly up on the back end and not touch the breaks until he was feet away from smashing their bumper. Along with trying to run everyone off the road he would weave in and out of lanes, almost like a drunk person, but I am pretty sure drunk people drive better. Umm... I feel like there is just more waiting to pour out about how truely offal the whole experience was.
Moving on to the more horrific/slightly amusing (other than the almost dying) moments.
Okay so it is more like moment, since it was the Denver adventure. I do not like traffic. I do not want anything to do with traffic. I think any town that needs a five lane highway I do not want to live there. Now, since that is established, I would like to say that parts of Denver are like that. I know it's not as bad as other cities, but still it's pretty bad. Especially because I am used to roads from podunk, nowhere farmville (no relation to the facebook game). The worst part, other than the lane shifting, was when the six lane road spliced into three exits.
We ended up taking the wrong one. Shocking, I know. In the end it was better because the driver really had to pee, but we still got utterly lost.
It was one of those exits that has an off ramp but no on ramps. Meaning we got ourselves off in the wrong spot.
To make a long story short we ended up following the GPS back to the highway. It only took two tries because it was late and the driver was grumpy and didn't want to listen to the GPS, but thought he knew better. That wold have been an okay thing if we had known where we were going, as it was it just ended up getting us lost more.
I feel like I could have made that sound more epic. But I am to damn tired to care.
It was horrible.
I thought the worst road trip of my life had already happened. I thought it was that trip when the girl driving had only two hours of sleep and fell asleep a few times while driving. This would have been more terrifying if I had been awake to witness it. The worst part of that trip was finding out that neither of us knew what exit to take to get to her house. Like I said it was pretty traumatic.
That doesn't include the passing on a two-lane highway, while going up a hill that had guard rails.
I thought we were going to die for sure.
Obviously it didn't happen. Barely.
Yeah, so I had previously thought that was the most terrifying road trip. Today I had to down grade that to the number two slot.
I sat in the back seat reading so I couldn't see out the front window. Most aggressive driver I have ever ridden with. Did not understand the concepts of space, blinkers or left lane cruising. He would drive fly up on the back end and not touch the breaks until he was feet away from smashing their bumper. Along with trying to run everyone off the road he would weave in and out of lanes, almost like a drunk person, but I am pretty sure drunk people drive better. Umm... I feel like there is just more waiting to pour out about how truely offal the whole experience was.
Moving on to the more horrific/slightly amusing (other than the almost dying) moments.
Okay so it is more like moment, since it was the Denver adventure. I do not like traffic. I do not want anything to do with traffic. I think any town that needs a five lane highway I do not want to live there. Now, since that is established, I would like to say that parts of Denver are like that. I know it's not as bad as other cities, but still it's pretty bad. Especially because I am used to roads from podunk, nowhere farmville (no relation to the facebook game). The worst part, other than the lane shifting, was when the six lane road spliced into three exits.
We ended up taking the wrong one. Shocking, I know. In the end it was better because the driver really had to pee, but we still got utterly lost.
It was one of those exits that has an off ramp but no on ramps. Meaning we got ourselves off in the wrong spot.
To make a long story short we ended up following the GPS back to the highway. It only took two tries because it was late and the driver was grumpy and didn't want to listen to the GPS, but thought he knew better. That wold have been an okay thing if we had known where we were going, as it was it just ended up getting us lost more.
I feel like I could have made that sound more epic. But I am to damn tired to care.
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