My new campaign

I hope everyone enjoys this as much as I did. This is the link to my new campaign idea. I hope you like it.

Death by Frufru

I spent my afternoon being forced into frufru abominations of death, aka bridesmaid dresses. My friend is getting married next June. She is picky about the dresses. Not picky like bridzilla, picky like she wants dresses that don't exist. She wants dresses with straps, but doesn't like any of the styles that come with straps. She doesn't want any cleavage showing, but that means necklines around the throat, which she doesn't like.

anyway it was an interesting endeavor. One that I don't really want to repeat but will have to.

Pet velociraptor

I woke up with a knot in my stomach, I had been dreaming about how a group of us had boughten a velociraptor. Yes I did just say we bought a velociraptor to keep as a pet. Most bizarre thing ever. In my defense I thought it was bad idea, but unfortunately one of my friends threatened to beat me up and steal my money unless I chipped in. I now own one quarter of a raptor, yes, because that makes me fell all warm in happy inside.

In my dream I was pretending to sleep so they wouldn't put the raptor in my room for the night. My friend had the thing attached to a purple leash. He was walking a raptor on a purple leash. And it was following with out killing him. Turned out that because I hadn't been at the adoption ceremony I wasn't considered a friend, so the stupid thing always tried to kill me. I ended up not being able to hang out with my friends because it was more important than my safety.

I am feeling disgruntled because my friends chose a velociraptor over me. This was a dream and that says quite a bit about me.

Anyway I will always remember to go to the adoption ceremony from now on when adopting raptors. Not like I will ever to that again.

The begining of the end

Today marks the first day of the end of days. Well the end of my days in college, before I can finally go on to bigger and better things. Students are slowly filtering back on campus and all of the new students are here for orientation week. I think it is hilariously funny that all new students are required to go to orientation for a week, and that it is a class credit that continues throughout the semester. I would have shot myself. So obnoxious.

As I am standing (more like siting) on the threshold of my final year in college I was wondering what I have learned these last three years. Has my time, effort, and money been wasted or will I walk away with a better understanding of the world?

I don't know. I can sit down and make a list of things that I have "learned" in school, but it is the lessons I have learned from my friends that will impact my life forever. It's not the class, it's not the teachers, it's not the books that I have learned the most from, it's from the people I spend everyday with, the friends that I hang out with. Those people are the ones that taught me what it means to be human. They taught me what it means to screw up, they walked me through the worst and best moments of my life, helping and supporting when I needed it most. In college I have faced some of my worst fears and at times I have failed. I Failed to choose the best outcome, instead I have hurt people, I have been hurt, and I have caused pain that could have been avoided. The only thing I was missing in the moments before choosing what would turn into something ugly, was experience. I try to live each day to the max, always looking for something new and interesting, but I have only lived 21 years.

Being young and idealistic makes choices difficult. I want to keep looking for the loop-hole, the one way everything will fall into place. I want everyone to be happy and working towards a better life, but that can't happen. Some people don't want to be happy and they will be damned if they don't take everyone down that road with them. Not like I am ever like that. Nope, not me.

If I said I was looking forward to all the wonderful things that will be happening this year I would be lying. The truth is that I am dreading the things that will happen this year. I am dreading the failed expectations, thankfully it won't be me failing this time. I am dreading the massive amount of work it will take to apply to grad school. I want to take my friends who are just super excited and combine our feelings so we are both hopeful while being realistic.

Cute! Cute! Cute!

I was feeling a little sad earlier and looked at pictures of these little cuties to cheer up.

That was trite

I looked back at my first ever facebook status update. It pretty much explains my personality to a T. "Michelle Current is totally going to fail her philosophy quiz" was my first ever status update, it was on January 15, 2009.

Finding that update was a pain inducing process, it required me to go through every update I had ever made ... They were not pleasant to read in retrospect. Over half of them made no sense, it was some inside joke that I have since forgotten. I don't think I had any updates that could be called intelligent or witty. All of my updates are trite, vapid, and self involved. I felt like one of those stupid bitches that doesn't take the time to focus on anything outside of their sphere of influence. It was an uncomfortable realization. I have always wanted to be funny, clever, and intelligent, but I am more bitchy, trite and vapid.

It is uncomfortable to be shown exactly how far I had fallen from what I want to be. It's like being slapped in the face, realizing that everything I have every done really didn't have any meaning, and it certainly didn't have any humor. I am not sure what to do with the information I was presented with. I can ignore it and continue to be a hypocrite that hates on people just like me, or I can accept what I am and move on, or (most likely) I can begrudgingly accept it and make very little progress towards being a better person.

I originally started blogging so that I would be writing consistently, but I haven't been putting any thought at all into my recent posts. Which basically makes it pointless to continue as I am, so look forward to a more introspective and interesting blog (maybe).

Quirky habits

I was re-watching Trigun last night and could not remember what episode Wolfwood dies in. This was a very upsetting realization. If I don't remember what episode he dies in I can't skip it. I have a bad habit of refusing to believe when one of my favorite characters gets killed. In most of my favorite shows they kill my favorite character. It is upsetting to watch my favorite character get killed, I refuse to do it twice.

I wish I could say that there are only a few series I do this with, but no, I avoid having to confront a fictitious characters death more than once. Unless I really disliked the character. I really wish that I could like the main character in show because then I would have a higher chance of my favorite character not dyeing.

Although that doesn't necessarily work. Spoiler Alert: in Gungrave my favorite character was the main character and he dies at the end. I am not sure that series should count though, technically Brandon Heat was already dead before the show started, he had just been resurrected (in a manor of speaking) to kill his best friend. Wow, that is depressing. Moral is to not watch depressing shows.

In case you were wondering (not likely, but to bad for you) here is a list of shows in which my favorite character dies:

Trigun
Gungrave
Full Metal Alchemist
Chrono Crusade
Burst Angel (Doesn't say that she dies, but implies it)
Cowboy Beebop (Also implication)
Naruto


That might not seem like a lot of shows, but I took each death personally. One of my previous roommates was very upset to find me crying hysterically when she had come back from class. The only thing I could say was "Th-Th-They,They Bo-They Both die dammit." She found it mildly disturbing that I was depressed for a week over a fictitious characters death. Like I said earlier I take my favorite characters deaths personally, it's like a slap in the face from authors. "I will create this marvelous person you will fall in love with only to kill them!" That is what an author tells me when a character dies.

Maybe I am to dramatic, take things to seriously, or am just deranged, but I empathize with characters on a level that leaves me stunned when they die.

Hence my not wanting to be forced to accept their impending demise when re-watching shows. But this is why I love Google, a little bit of research and I can be happily assured I will never again be traumatized by an unexpected death.

The easy life

Anyone who can stand up and walk without getting black spots in the corner of their vision, who can breath without coughing, and who can drink without feeling like someone is stabbing them in the throat has an easy life. Add a pounding headache to that list too. I hate being sick. Really hate it. Especially when all I want to do is sleep and things keep interrupting me. Makes me angry. And tired. And unpleasant to be around.

I just want to feel healthy and for the headache I have had the last few days to go away. Please. I would really appreciate being able to move without the fear of blacking out.

Moving sucks

I spent most of my morning moving stuff from one room to another. It made me want to throw everything out the window drench it in gasoline and toss a lit match on top. So much useless stuff. Well that is the crux of the problem. It really isn't useless stuff, there is just more stuff than I can need right now, but the minute I get an apartment it will become necessary. Freaking small dorm rooms that make me think I have to much crap when in reality the dorm is just tiny.

A bag of flour I had stored on a self in my room decided to go fuzzy and green. It was nasty. I still need to clean the room, but I think that was the reason for my getting sick so often this summer. I would really like to know what happened to make the flour bag go fluffy though. I think it might have just been the humidity, which I find really disturbing. I would like to live in a place where I can keep cooking supplies without the fear of them going green and fuzzy on me.

I hate humidity.

Spy vs. Spy

I had a date this weekend. A date with Michael Weston. It was awesome! Nothing really beats having a burn notice marathon. I finally finished second season, I am almost done with season 3. It's one of the best shows I have ever seen, probably because I have a covert ops fetish.

One thing that really pisses me off though is the character name overlap. One of the stories I am working on has a character named Samantha, called Sam, and the main antagonist's name is Jean-Pierre. Well the first episode I watched after naming those characters had a Sam, obviously, and a Jean-Pierre in it. The irony was to much. It almost made me cry. Then I got over it.

Okay that was a lie. I am totally not over it. But what can I do? I could change the names, but those are the characters names. Any other names wouldn't fit, which means I just need to get over it.

TGIF ... Grad school blues

I woke up this morning determined to get to work early and promptly went back to bed when my alarm went off. An extra five minutes became an hour, and then next thing I know it's past ten in the morning. Not a good thing to realize when the coffee hasn't even been made yet.

Work ended up with me looking into various graduate schools. They are freaking expensive! And the degree that I want, MFA in creative writing, has really competitive programs. Makes me want to cry. It would probably be better if I wasn't trying to get into the top schools in the country ... But if I am going to willing get more schooling it is not going to be at an unknown school. I am so done with that. Most of the candidates are on the east coast, surprise surprise, and have a max of ten students they allow into the program every year. This doesn't make it sound very inviting to me. Another problem is my GPA, it is not above a 3.0 right now. It really needs to be above a 3.0 for me to be taken even remotely seriously during this process. This won't be a problem if the deadline is after January, I can get my grades up in one semester. I can. But if any of the application deadlines are before January I am screwed.

Basically this whole process is going to kick my ass.

Happy Friday!

Idiots and chocolate

I recently read an interview of M. Night Shyamalan, he had no idea how bad his movie sucked. No idea. Conclusion: He is a dumb-ass who can't write and has no idea what reality is. Proof of his inadequacies as a human. The last Airbender was a tragic piece of shit. It was movie that immediately lost any potential for goodness when Shyamalan decided to write it.

On a side note: I was seriously sick yesterday and had no desire to blog. Correction I forgot while fading in and out of consciousness that I was trying to blog everyday. So sorry, my bad.

A wonderful thing happened yesterday, a friend bought me the most delectable chocolates, Belgium truffles rolled in dark chocolate. So good! Unfortunately I really shouldn't eat any because I am still sick, but when I get better I can eat them! Thanks sweetie.

Update: On top of being sick I have decided that I need to limit the number of posts written by Sassy ... This is much more difficult then I thought it was going to be. But to be productive at work it really needs to happen.

loud noises are evil

When I was younger I used to be a morning person, when I hit middle school I became a night owl, in high school I was forced to be a morning person (I had a 6:30 a.m. Calculus class, it was evil). Now that I am in college (almost done! Only a year left) I have become something of an enigma with my sleeping patterns. It's pretty random. Once I am awake I am awake, it doesn't matter what time of day it is, it just depends on how much sleep I have had previously, when I get to go to bed again, and most importantly how I was woken up.

I hate loud noises. I hate vacuums. I hate alarms. I hate anything that disrupts my concentration. I hate being woken up by a chain saw at 7:30 a.m.

There should be a law that doesn't allow people to use loud machinery before 10 in the morning. It was even worse because they would stop for five minutes and I would think they were going to be done. After being lulled in to a false sense of quite I would be rudely awoken by the noises again. This happened several times, I wanted to chuck a grenade out my window so the loud noises would stop.

To top it off I spilled creamer all over my desk, the desk that I had just cleaned. Grrr. After going to work I found out that the windows are being replaced, and they were using machines to cut the wood out... today was just not fun. I hate loud noises. I know I should be thankful I can hear, but it would be really nice to have real selective hearing.

"Coffee isn't its own food group?"

Being a college student means very little money, unless your parents support you. Very little money means cutting corners, however there are some corners that shouldn't be cut. I have been trying to cut back on eating so that my food bill will go down, not like it is very high at the moment, so I randomly skip meals (mostly breakfast, if I eat breakfast I eat more all day). I start of the day with coffee, an entire pot, by lunch I want more coffee (this is normal, but I don't normally make any) and around supper time I again want to drink coffee. This is bad because on the weekends I have started to substitute coffee for meals, all the meals. I might eat three meals during the entirety of a weekend.

This is reflected by more poor performance on Mondays. I can hardly drag my ass out of bed, I get up hours after my alarm goes off, I can't focus until after lunch. Slowly as the week goes on I become more human, but then sure enough the weekend rolls around and I am lucky to get one square meal... This is not a healthy process.

I should probably be more worried about this than I am, but that would require me to put effort into something. Since it is Monday I will not be able to get anything done till after lunch.

The end of an era

Today is a bitter sweet day. My favorite website was taken down last night, thanks to publishing licenses they had to stop. It was a website that was by fans for fans. It was a testament to the better parts of human nature. Most people don't even take time to smile when walking past others one the street, but then people on onemanga go out of their way to scan, clean, translate, and typeset manga so that fans in other countries could read the most recent chapters. It is a great community that, hopefully, will continue to be a welcoming place to all manga fans.

As an avid manga reader today is a very sad day. I can understand the legalities, but the communication major in me wants to know why a different solution couldn't be worked out. I want to know why the publishers weren't even willing to discuss different alternatives. The best way for a disagreement to be settled is for everyone to sit down and hash it out. There has to be a better alternative than just shutting down the site. They obviously don't understand the first thing about the fan community.

Onemanga wasn't doing it for money, they weren't doing it for personal benefits, they were doing all that work because they wanted to share something they love. Because being a manga fan means being a part of something bigger, it means being a part of a diverse world were the only thing that matters is a mutual love of a great story.

Thank you publishers for not taking the fans of your work seriously. We really appreciate it.

Crazy drivers

I had thought that my various trips to California had shown me the craziest drivers in the world. I was wrong. I was driving around town a few days ago and I pull up to a stop light where the car in front of me is in both lanes. It was a two lane road and the dude was just chilling in the middle. I didn't know what to do so I stopped a normal length behind him. The next car that pulled up (I was in the left lane they were in the right lane) and forced his way up next to the crazy middle of the lane driver. By doing this they blocked the right turning lane. I hate people who do that.

I also hate left lane cruisers. I want to carry a rocket launcher in my car on long road trips so I can blow up the left lane cruisers. Especially the ones that are going ten miles UNDER the speed limit. Seriously, they need to stop.

Yes I am going to pass you pull in front of you and then slow waaaaaaay down. Cuz I am awesome! I HATE drivers like that. Omg I want to kill them too.

I just want to forcibly move any driver that is keeping me from reaching my destination in a reasonable time (meaning significantly faster than should be possible).

And people who don't use their blinkers. Why do we have blinkers if you aren't going to use them? "I'll Kill you!"

I don't particularly like people who cut me off... But if they use their blinker I don't get mad. However if they don't use their blinker I want to ram the back of their car.