I had brilliantly witty post idea ... this is not it.

I cannot, for the life of me, remember what it was that struck me as super awe inspiring about five minutes ago. But it is now gone. All gone.

Like the ice cream in the freezer, or more accurately the ice cream that was in the freezer that is now in my tummy. It was delicious.

The Evil summer class is done and now I am moving on to bigger and more obnoxious things. Job hunting, internship hunting. Trying to find the rarest of all game. The elusive dream job.

I would like to say that lightning has struck me and that in the after image I saw my life's work depicted and I know now exactly what my life is all working towards. As cool as that would be, which is questionable because getting hit my lighting would really hurt, it's sooo very, very, very, very far from true. If anything, these last few weeks have had me questioning everything I want, everything I thought I wanted, everything I was mildly interested in.

In reality that is what this last year has been. Some unfortunate events happened last summer that left me anger, jaded and headed on a hell train straight for apathy. No stops, no detours, do not pass go.

Imagine you're dream house. The house you will one day by with a spouse and fill with 2.5 children. The house that reflects the essence of your soul.

Now picture a big, black smoking train engine. One of the really old coal powered ones. Only this isn't powered by coal, it's powered by the Queen Bitch. The Queen Bitch has decided that she is tired of lobing grenades at the house and instead aims that big metal train straight at the house.

And what's left?

Not much. Not much at all.

That house is my world, everything I believed, everything I was taught, everything I could imagine.

The train not only knocks out major supporting beams but sets the rest of the house on fire, burning it to a crisp. And then the rain comes.

Why?

Because I am just that lucky. The rain manages to put out most of the fire, but that leaves a soggy, smoky, slightly smoldering, train infested ruin of a house.

Living life questioning everything is difficult. It leaves very little time to for fun. Which is why I've decided to be awesome.

Okay not really. That is something a good friend says lots and I think everyone should listen.

This is a lot more depressing than I thought it was going to be. But on the bright side I now no longer have to get up at the butt crack of dawn to get ready for class.